Thats exactly how i feel today because my bird died today. I've had her for about 6 years, maybe more. She was a blue parakeet. Her name was Honey. Sadness...
I hop into the car. The long school day is now far behind me and my mind is elated with the idea of knowing that i only have homework from 3 subjects tonight. Kelsey is sitting next to me. Her lavender-esque shirt is burning my retinas in the bright, afternoon sunlight. My mom and i are giving her a ride home and so i sit with her in the back because i find it odd when you sit up front and your guest/friend sits in the back. Its awkward. Anyway as we are pulling into her driveway and letting her out i notice that i had been sitting on a wet spot in the back of the car. A water bottle had exploded and i didn't realize. Great, now my shorts where soaking wet. Its like the most uncomfortable thing in the world, sitting with wet clothes. As she got out, she thanked my mother and walked up her long driveway to her house and i moved up to the front seat, hitting my shin on the protruding cupholder. As i buckle myself in (click it or ticket!)my mom starts pulling out of Kelsey's driveway and is heading for the exit from her neighborhood. As she is looking to the left to make a right turn out of the neighborhood she says, "Violet, i have some sad news. And i dont want you to get too upset because we knew it was going to happen soon anyway." All of the sudden my mind thinks of everyone i know who could fall under the category of soon to be dead. My grandfather, although my mom had told me that he was doing extremly well for his age. Our family friend who has parkinsons disease. She wasn't doing too well. I thought it was someone who was important to me but somehow i just couldn't think of who it could possibly be. "The bird died" she said. "What?" i say. I was perplexed. Hoping that i had heard it wrong. "Yeah" my mom said, quielty.
Tears come. Rushing down my face and making my green eyes burn. They come out like a vigerous storm making my whole body shake and making my cheeks searing hot. I start crying. Thinking about how its almost been a year since Shadow died. Now Honey. Then i start to think, well what if this means that Lillian and Stella will drop dead soon? What if they get hit by a car or run away and i never see them again or they get cancer like Shabby. Then i think about people. How one day we're all going to be dead. I get scared when i think about death. Really legitimatly scared.
When i get home i lie down on the floor next to Stella, crying into her long blonde fur, with Lillian rubbing her little face against my neck, trying to snuggle in. I get up from the floor after Stella walks away and i go into the kitchen where Honey's cage was suspended from the ceiling. It wasn't there.
And while looking at the empty space of what was, i didn't even notice that my shorts where still wet.
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